The Strangest Human Being

Some are born infamous, some achieve infamy, and others thrust their infamy on you. I have encountered one such person. I will call her Amanda Lauren (which is not her real name. She goes by it, but it's not her real name). The most infamous story (which perhaps you have even heard yourself and thought to be an urban legend) goes something like this:

We were in an intermediate level acting class taught by the wonderful Phil Soltanoff. The class was more composition based than it was about scene work or "normal" theater, and exercises/assignments took on varied shapes and colors. One week the assignment was to do a "presentation of self". The framework of the assignment was intentionally loose ("work with your understanding of the assignment"), and results varied. As might be expected at a liberal arts college in its last throws of granola-hippy-culture, one girl (who was an avid member of the Ultimate Frisbee Team which was known for having "naked points" on Fridays) chose to include naked jumping jacks in her presentation. Which was fine, even expected. I mean, we were in our early twenties and being asked to test boundaries. Someone had to do it. And nudity was just not that uncommon at Skidmore College.

The next class. Phil begins the class by saying, "Let's do rants. Just get up here and do a 30 second rant about something." So there were rants about Saratoga snow, annoying roommates, etc. Then Amanda took the floor.

"I just wanted to say that I was really offended that _____ got naked in class last time. Really, I couldn't get it out of my mind the rest of the day, and I was disgusted." Stunned silence. Everyone was trying not to look at naked girl, who was a very warm soul and didn't seem to care all that much. But the rest of us were rather indignant on her behalf. But Amanda wasn't done. "And I know that it's winter, and people get lazy or whatever, but you really need to work on your maintenance."

After she dropped the m-bomb, everything becomes a blur. Did we break out into hysterics? Did our jaws hit the floor? Was there mass rebellion? I vaguely remember Phil saying something along the lines of "That was a very honest response, and you are entitled to share that opinion," which was a good save I suppose.

I realize this story loses a lot when read instead of told, because most of the humor is found in Amanda's incredibly idiosyncratic/bizarre manner of speech and deportment. For years I have been telling incredible stories about her, and have managed to do a pretty decent impersonation of her, but was never able to truly capture the spirit of Amanda Finkletein...er, Lauren. Until now. Because she posted a video of herself on YouTube. Doing Stand-Up. And no, this is not an "act" or a character she created. This is how she talks and moves. All the time. It's 6+ minutes, but I believe you will be too entranced to look away.